The other evening I was sitting snuggled on the couch with my hubby, the lights from the Christmas tree giving off a soft glow and with White Christmas playing on the TV, I couldn’t help but think about how blessed I am for all that I have. Even though we don’t have children yet, I know they will come and I cherish the moments like these because I know that when the kids come, we may not get moments like that as often.
Usually the holiday are a hard time for me, especially Christmas. I start getting everyone’s family Christmas cards in the mail and I get to see their cute perfect little families. I see parents with their children doing fun family actives and building traditions that will impact their children’s whole life. A lot of the Christmas movies are geared around families and many of them show the parents getting so much joy out of seeing their children get so excited about Christmas and opening their presents. I think another thing that is hard is the fact that my birthday is around this time and every year I keep getting older and with every birthday it is another reminder that I am getting older and that another year without being able to become a mother.
Although all of those things are difficult for me, it is times like that night that are a tender mercy for me. I know that the lord is aware of us and our needs as well as he is giving us the time to build our relationship and make it stronger. At this time of year it can be easy to focus on the things I don’t have instead of the things that I do have. I have a little family, granted we don’t have children, but that doesn’t make my family anything less. I have to remind myself that together we can enjoy the Christmas season and our time will come when we will get to celebrate Christmas with our children, we just have to trust in the plan that our father in heaven has for us.