The other evening I was sitting snuggled on the couch with
my hubby, the lights from the Christmas tree giving off a soft glow and with
White Christmas playing on the TV, I couldn’t help but think about how blessed I
am for all that I have. Even though we don’t have children yet, I know they
will come and I cherish the moments like these because I know that when the
kids come, we may not get moments like that as often.
Usually the holiday are a hard time for me, especially Christmas.
I start getting everyone’s family Christmas cards in the mail and I get to see
their cute perfect little families. I see parents with their children doing fun
family actives and building traditions that will impact their children’s whole
life. A lot of the Christmas movies are geared around families and many of them
show the parents getting so much joy out of seeing their children get so
excited about Christmas and opening their presents. I think another thing that is hard is the fact
that my birthday is around this time and every year I keep getting older and
with every birthday it is another reminder that I am getting older and that
another year without being able to become a mother.
Although all of those things are difficult for me, it is
times like that night that are a tender mercy for me. I know that the lord is
aware of us and our needs as well as he is giving us the time to build our
relationship and make it stronger. At this time of year it can be easy to focus
on the things I don’t have instead of the things that I do have. I have a
little family, granted we don’t have children, but that doesn’t make my family
anything less. I have to remind myself that together we can enjoy the Christmas
season and our time will come when we will get to celebrate Christmas with our
children, we just have to trust in the plan that our father in heaven has for
us.
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